I can finally report a personal breakthrough, although it feels almost too good to be true. 3 days ago, I took delivery of a Samsung S95D (55"). Having watched a variety of content over the weekend, I am pretty sure this is the one (finally). Not only is the matte finish a delight for the eyes, and does not take away anything from the stunning picture, the motion processing on this tv is also a big step up over previous OLED-tvs I tried over the years.
Here is a list of TVs I tried with no luck;
LG CX 65" & 55"
LG C2 55"
Samsung S95B 55"
Other devices I can tolerate:
Nintendo Switch Oled (took a few days to get used to it but now zero issues)
iPhone 14 (painful from time to time, can't really pinpoint the cause, but it's usable with moderation)
The most surprising part about the S95D - I don't even have to tinker with the settings. It's just comfortable out of the box. Yes, the first few hours took some adjusting but I think I was also overthinking it. As soon as I tried it for regular use, I forgot it was a new tv and it was perfectly comfortable. HDR on my PS5 is extremely bright but apart from that, doesn't cause any eye strain and can easily be toned down a little.
If anyone has any questions, fire away. I'm just happy that I finally found the one for me